It has been so enlightening to be discovering … accepting … realizing … learning things about myself lately. I know that sounds a bit self-centered but in a time when the likes and dislikes and opinions and interests and behaviors and activities and habits and meal-plans and accomplishments and cleaning schedules and … you name it …. of everyone else is being dangled in our faces (sometimes flung in our faces) it is all the more important to know who your self is.
To do so helps in the effort to not get whip-lash when tracking who everyone else is (and what makes them tick) and also prevents us from falling into the comparison trap or the “I must do that too” trap.
Some things I’m learning about myself then….
I prefer a 10am cup of coffee over a 6am cup.
I am a converted introvert, which is precisely why I do not feel left out when I am not connected to social media. And is precisely why social media drains me, but doesn’t consume me. I know I have not always been this way.
Ice cream makes my stomach hurt.
I prefer teaching the boys math and history and not writing. Though, I prefer writing over doing math or making history.
I prefer tidy over clean … or rather, tidying over cleaning.
I am bothered by the random sock, empty water bottle, cat toy, paper airplane and unfolded throw blanket scattered around the living room, but not at all the three drawers of Legos and the creation being constructed from them that has been covering the majority of the floor for the majority of the week. Apparently the ‘why’ behind the untidiness matters to me.
During a chaotic time in parenting, I’ll feel the pull to hide out in my nicely organized storage room. Because there is order there and I really like that, especially when there is not order in my relating with the boys or theirs with each other.
This has taught me that I declutter and tidy and organize as much for the visual aesthetic as I do my need to produce and control order in some area of my life.
I’ll also feel the pull toward my hairdryer during those chaotic times, but that is nothing new.
I’ve realized that I prefer weeding my garden to planting it.
I prefer planning our meals to making them. Or eating them. Or cleaning up after them.
I’ve realized that as much as I adore taking photos and having the keepsake of photos, I don’t enjoy having a big collection of images to cull and edit because I do not like sitting at my computer desk. Really at all. And the answer to that is simply to not overshoot.
Acts of service is my love language. Helping me scrub my floors is equivalent to diamonds. Well, maybe not diamonds, but perhaps to a nice new shirt. 😉
I love to read aloud.
I’ve learned that I will get to the ever present items on my to-do list, so I don’t need to stress about them in the meantime. The items will be done by the time they need to be done … for instance: I know now I don’t need to stress about doing taxes during the time I’m not working on them. I know the mood will strike before they are due and I will get them done. So I know not to stress in the months leading to that point or to feel guilty about the time that passed by during which I could have been doing them. Same with cleaning the toilets. Or washing the laundry. Or getting the dog groomed. I’ve learned to chill about the to-dos because I know they will get done.
I’ve discovered that I love hot pink polish on my toes, but remain faithful to the nude tone on my fingers.
And, I’ve realized that a walk in the sunshine with my family … no matter how many times we’ve cruised the same path … is the perfect end to the day. ♥
I hope you’re learning, accepting and discovering things about yourself. There is comfort, clarity, and freedom in it for sure. ♥
Thanks for visiting! Off to go pull a few weeds! 😉